Pick Up Your Damn Poop.

Few things bother me more than someone not picking up after their dog. I won't get into hyperbole, but I can't think of anything in my daily life that bothers me more.

When I am out walking my dogs, I always carry the brightest colored (biodegradable!) bags I can find. When I am out walking, I want everyone to know that I pick up after my pets. I pick up the huge quarter pounders Brody pinches off, and the little Tootsie Rolls that Bella ever so daintily drops when she feels the need. I always try to carry the bags with me after I've used them so people will see them, and know that I did not leave the giant, steamy pile that is sitting on the curb and attracting flies.

I don't understand why more people won't follow my lead.

Poop is disgusting, but it needs to be talked about. I don't want to touch it, smell it, or find it on the bottom of my shoes. I'm not asking for pet owners to pick it up with their teeth, wipe it on their hands, or keep it for show and tell. I'm just asking them to take responsibility for their pets so a child doesn't end up touching poop and getting sick, or Heaven forbid blinded from roundworms. It's just part of pet ownership.

Pet supply manufacturers understand the responsibility and they also understand the inconvenience of carrying a bunch of bags and trying to fumble around with them and leashes. They also understand that it does not look terribly adorable to have a walmart bag tied to your belt loop. So they have solutions.

Look at how cute this bag is! You put your roll of bags in the little dispenser, attach it to your leash, your purse, or your belt loop and LOOK AT YOU! You are responsible and fashionable. What is more awesome than that?



These ones have diamonds and matching bags! Fashion! They attach to just about anything and don't require you to bring a fanny pack when you walk (unless you like your fanny pack, which in that case, be who you are!)

Mine has little skulls and crossbones. I ordered it about two years ago and never regretted it. I loved it so much that I bought my dad a camouflage one, and a back-up one for myself that became my boyfriend's bag. It has white skulls on it. Very manly.


They make the bags themselves in all different colors and prints and sizes. They're biodegradable and sanitary.

Once, I was taking Brody and Ellie for a walk, and they had both pooped along the way and I had used the bag I brought. Pretty routine for a normal walk. I am a ninja and can scoop two dooks in one bag. I forgot my dispenser and didn't think anything of it because I was in a rush to get them home and go to dinner or something equally unimportant. About 4 blocks from my house, there is a nice sit down restaurant with outdoor seating, which we always walk by. Ellie must have been just overcome with the smell of food or the chance to embarrass her mother (both?) and popped a squat right there. I thought she was on empty! I became Poop Maguyver at this point and decided to try and get the poop with whatever was handy. I found a piece of paper and a trash can near by, so I scooped the poo up with the paper and tossed it into the trash. Everyone at the restaurant clapped, and I laughed the whole way home. (It should be noted that I usually don't condone throwing poop in the trash cans of others, we're trying NOT to be rude here, but this was a desperate time.) I went from being an obnoxious girl with too many dogs to a socially responsible person in an instant.

So next time you are out walking your dogs, bring some bags and pick up after them. It's the cool thing to do. It helps ensure that dogs are allowed in parks, on the sidewalks, and that dog owners are looked upon favorably. It's also the hygienic thing to do.